Saturday, February 11, 2012

Dwayne the Banana Pants!

I don't know an adult who likes these, but I think it's even worse when your kid only knows ONE.  No variety, no downtime from this one horrible joke.  In my case, the only joke my daughter knows is (I believe) from Dora.

Knock knock
Who's there?
Banana Who?
(and this is where I'm expected to say "haha, that's funny!"  Fortunately for me, my children are still young enough that they cannot tell the difference between the first time I say it, glad to be playing with them, and the tenth time I say it, when I'm quietly searching for the roll of duct tape that will silence them.)

I tried to teach my 2 year old a new joke today, one I learned (and over used) as a kid - I'm sure we all did.  It goes like this.

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Dwayne who?
Dwain the bathtub! I'm dwowning!
(I know it's awesome right? It's better than Banana pants over and over okay!)

Unfortunately, the conversation with Lauren went like this (red is me, blue is her):

I'm gonna teach you a NEW joke!
You say 'knock knock.'
Knock knock.
I say'Who's there?"
Who's there?
No, *I* say 'who's there?'   Then you say Dwayne.  Can you say Dwayne?
Awesome.  Then I say 'Dwayne who?' and you say 'Dwain the bathtub, I'm dwowning.  Can you say that?
Dwain bathtub, I dwowning.
Perfect! Okay let's try.  You say knock knock!
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
No no.  You say Dwayne.
Oh. Dwayne.
Dwayne who.
You say "dwain the bathtub, I'm dwowning."
Dwain bathtub, I dwown.
I'll take it!  Let's try again. You say knock knock.
Knock knock.
Who's there?!
(to myself: Excellent!) Dwayne who?!
Banana pants!
One more time, from the top! *repeats joke in entirely* Got it?
Got it.
Sweet.  You say knock knock.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
 Is it DWAYNE?
No, I'm Lauren!

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